Thursday, May 17, 2012

Greatest Blonde Joke of All Time

I always have pictures of scantily clad men on my blog,
and to give the men a thrill, I am adding some
big beautiful buxom blondes today....


(Pssst....Ladies...I am not nuts....there is a present for you at the bottom.......so read the rest of the post!)






I found an interesting article...

Found in Men's Health

Dumb Blondes, or Dumb Men?

"A blonde walks into a bar..."
We've all heard dumb-blonde jokes, but it turns out the joke may be on men.


A new study at the University of Paris - Nanterre found that a woman's hair color influenced men's performance on general intelligence tests.

Men who looked at photogrpahs of blonde women scored lower on the tests than men shown images of brunettes and redheads.

Although there is no scientific evidence that blondes are less intelligent than other women, the stereotype causes men to subconsciously become dumber, researchers say.

Moral of the story?  You want your husband or boyfriend to do what you want?  Show them those pictures up above.





Monday, May 14, 2012

Sexy Man Monday - Exposing Him (XX)

I've always wondered why men feel the insatiable need to expose themselves to women.  Short ones, fat ones, long ones, ginormous ones, it's all the same.  Every man I know has at least once in his life, taking a picture of his penis with the need to share it with at least one other person.

Now, it might be different, and understandable, if other women felt the same need.  Or perhaps they do and I'm one of those odd ones that really doesn't feel the need to pop out the puppies and snap a polaroid.  But I'm sort of guessing I'm not.  And if you have polaroids, I don't want to see them.  I really don't.


Stop! No puppy polaroids!

Unless you're a hot guy with a large penis.  Then send me any and all pictures you want.

I stumbled across a site last night that had a ton of random pictures of average joes.  Well, average may be a bit of an understatement, as all of these pictures included men who are FAR above averagewhen it comes to penis size.

Now...I will forewarn you, not all of these men have the hellacious bodies which I usually star in Sex Man Monday, some of them are skinny and scrawny.  But they have one attribute that the heavens above have graced them with.

And a couple of them, may be enhanced...ala photoshop.  There are a couple that I question but can't tell for sure.  Yell out the numbers and see if we agree.

So on to the cell phone pics of cocks.  Bring 'em on.

Yes, please.

What is up with those wrinkles?  Is it articulated?

Moby Dick..he'll make you scream Ahaaaaaaab!!!

I wonder if he has back problems carrying that thing around?  Jeez!

Can you say douchebag?  He needs a haircut and some Proactive....maybe a good woman to smack him around a little. 

Is that really a third leg?

Is it sad that the first thing I noticed was how messy his room is and not his abs of steel? 

Still messy...clean that shit up before you take dick pics!

That's OMG (Over-sized Male Genitalia)...and what is up with guys and measuring?  Really?

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Six Sentence Sunday - Thirty-eight

       I'm having a retro day here, returning to an earlier SSS post now that Park and Ride has finally been released.


      Kellee, our heroine has come across an interesting car beside her.  One she can't stop looking into.

Eyes back on the road, she swerved slightly as she realized she was coasting close to the edge.  She returned her gaze as quickly as possible to the car beside her, not able to stop watching the man’s deliciously naughty performance.

     His broad, tanned hand reached into his dark boxer briefs and he began to touch himself, not allowing her a glimpse of the flesh he obviously stroked beneath of soft jersey. She felt her own clit thicken; the electric pulses running through the nub of flesh forced her to emit a soft moan in response. Her tight pencil skirt prevented her from touching herself in return, though she ached to follow his lead.


     Two white-knuckled fists on the steering wheel, she watched in utter fascination as the stranger pumped his own cock, just out of her view. 







Wanna Read More Sixes?

Saturday, May 12, 2012

HAPPY NATIONAL LIMERICK DAY!!!

Yes, today is a holiday.  It's National Limerick Day. And of course, I could not go the whole day through without sharing one or two that I wrote for the occasion.  


There was a hot girl who wrote porn,
Who got her sweet pussy shorn,
She was warned and told,
That it would be cold,
Her frizzy locks, she sure did mourn.
©2012, Alexandra O’Hurley


There was a girl who liked to fuck
On beds, in pools, and in trucks
She got some VD
And it burned when she peed
She then knew she’d lost all of her luck.
©2012, Alexandra O’Hurley 

Have a deliciously naughty Dirty Limerick Day :)

Friday, May 11, 2012

Silver Fox Friday

I posted a couple of pictures of an incredibly hot silver fox a couple of days ago on Facebook...but there were one or two more that the FB po-po would have gotten me for it I'd added.  And we allll know my war with Facebook and my many, many slaps on the hand, so we need not go there.

Stephen Ritts is incredibly hawt, and officially added to my hot men over 40 countdown I had a while back.  He may just have to take over the #1 spot, personally.

There isn't much that I've been able to find on Mr. Ritts on the nets, but the few pictures that are there more than make up for that...and hopefully there will be more forthcoming.

I'm re-posting the original three pics I posted as well as the extras I have.

TGIF folks!











Thursday, May 10, 2012

New Naughty Fairy Tale! Welcome Adonis Devereux!



Welcome the writing couple who make up Adonis Deverux -- they're bringing us a snippet from their new Naughty Fairy Tale which is OUT TODAY!


Max is a soldier down on his luck, and when the king sends out a call for volunteers to solve the mystery of the twelve dancing princesses, Max figures he has nothing to lose, nothing, of course, except his head if he should fail.

Max has faced death before and doesn't fear it, but when he meets the princesses, all lovely, light-hearted, and battling constant exhaustion due to their mysterious nightly escapades, he realizes he could lose his heart as well. To win his princess, Max must break the spell. But he must face the truth that the twelve princesses are terribly naughty and do much more than just dance, and he will have to join in the amorous festivities himself to get them out.

Excerpt


Each princess chose two dancing partners, and an invisible orchestra struck up a waltz. The music fell like dew drops and moonlight over the room, coating everyone and everything in its beauty, doubling in Max his longing for Alaren. She fell into the arms of one of her partners, leaning back into his chest. He cradled her in his powerful arms, and they swayed together. The other man joined them, and Alaren was pressed between their flesh. They moved with the waltz, their feet unerringly skipping across the ballroom floor while their bodies undulated against one another. They moved like waves in the sea. Each thrust evoked a pull. When one exhaled, the other inhaled. Grab and swirl, push and grind, the dancers performed their sex-waltz. Max brought himself almost to climax before he stopped suddenly, letting his cock go as it twitched in anticipation of orgasm. He knew how to build up his cum for a final, explosive release. He grabbed his cock again and resumed stroking.

Perdita, the mistress of the ball, walked around to different trios of dancers and administered light spankings where she thought appropriate. Some of the twins she upbraided for not giving themselves to the night, for not dancing with all the passion they could muster. The princesses giggled and moaned, enjoying every moment of their punishment. Max wondered if some of them did not dance badly on purpose just so they could get spanked. After being disciplined, the twins danced with greater heat as they wiggled their buttocks on their partners growing cocks. Perdita walked on, and the expression on her face reminded Max of a matron of a particular cat-house he used to visit regularly. Everyone had assumed that due to her severity, she hated men and wanted nothing to do with them. But Max had known better. Over her own protestations, he gave her a good fucking one night, taking her instead of one of her girls. That was just what she had needed, and he had known that. Whenever he went back there, he always fucked her. Perdita was much the same way. She looked stern and intimidating, but Max knew all she needed – all she wanted – was a forceful cock inside her that would not spurt within the first minute of intercourse. Strong women had that effect on men. They needed even stronger men with even greater stamina to topple them and give them the orgasms they craved. 

Max returned his attention to Alaren, and his cock regained its vigor. Alaren was the woman for him; there was no doubt about it. She was what he needed. Max lost track of time. He did not know how long he stood there jacking off, but the music finally ended. The princesses’ slippers were worn through. They must have danced for hours, but how time flowed in the faery realm Max did not know. He was still as horny as ever. The princesses were all covered in sweat, their hair drenched and clinging to her skin, their corsets moving up and down with their labored breathing.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Guest Blogger - Doris O'Connor

Happy Hump Day....and do we have some humping here.  Doris O'Connor is here today to talk her TWO (that's right, count 'em, TWO) new releases.  Too Cold to Love is the continuing saga of the Giovanni clan.  Riding Her Tiger....well, I'd say that title is pretty darn self-explanatory.

Let's start with Riding Her Tiger...

Can one night change your life forever? 

Estelle has been lusting after her kinky boss Nathan for ages, but how you do you snare a much older Dom? You enlist the help of the internet.

Matched to exploration facilitator Ink, Estelle explores her submissive fantasies to the full. When online sex turns to a real life ménage will a case of mistaken identity ruin her chances with Nathan?

Or will the shifter claim his mate?


Excerpt

"Lean back against me, and relax. Nothing is going to happen, yet." Her stomach tightened at the growled words into her neck, and she watched as he grabbed the huge sponge by the side of the bath and proceeded to run it up and down her arms slowly. He washed every inch of her body with great care. Her breasts grew heavy and her breathing shallow, her nipples jutting out into the humid air of the bathroom, and he smiled into her neck. By the time his hands reached her pussy she was so aroused the slightest scrape of the sponge against her labia sent her tumbling into an orgasm.
Ink groaned into her neck, and she froze. Shiiit! He hadn't given her permission to come. 
"Ah, sweetheart, that was fucking hot, but not very wise." Her eyes flew open at Grisha's husky words, and her mouth went dry. "We'll have to think of a suitable punishment, Ink." The Russian was stark naked, his huge swollen cock jutting up out of its nest of thick, black hair, to his tight abdomen, the tip glistening with drops of pre-cum. She hadn't been able to fully appreciate the sheer size of him before, and she licked her lips. He smiled at her and fisted himself with slow, measured strokes. Her cunt clenched, and her insides tightened, recalling his earlier promise. She was never going to be able take him in her ass.
As if Ink had heard her thoughts, his hands spread her ass cheeks, and his fingers probed. She bit her lip at the invasion of two and then three long fingers.
"Indeed we will, Grisha." She squirmed as he thrust his fingers in and out of her tight hole. He pinched her clit with his other hand, and Estelle moaned as the pain zinged along her pussy, to join with the sensations spreading from her ass. She whimpered when he released the tight nub of nerves only to repeat the action, again, and again. Her labia swelled and throbbed, and she writhed in the water, dimly aware of Grisha joining them in the bath. He knelt in front of her, and his hands grabbed her hips, holding her still.
"Stop moving, and take your punishment like a good little sub, sweetheart." He smiled when she went still, and Estelle bit her lip to stop herself from moaning. She watched as he leaned forward and took one of her nipples in his mouth. He bit down hard, and tears sprang into Estelle's eyes.  He soothed the sting with his tongue and then repeated the action to the other nipple. Ink pinched her clit in time to Grisha's bites, his fingers in her ass pushing deeper and deeper, until Estelle couldn't distinguish between the waves of pain swamping her. Pain that morphed into something else entirely. Unable to keep her eyes open, she let her head fall back onto Ink's shoulder. Her body felt lighter, every nerve-ending on fire, sending pulses of heat through her veins, Ink's murmured encouragements in her ear grounding her in the here and now.
Her skin tightened, and her clit throbbed in time with the waves rushing through her. She shuddered when cool air hit her wet flesh, before she encountered smooth leather. Ink pushed her down until her breasts were flattened against the padded bench, and she gasped as her legs and arms were fastened. Before she could panic at being restrained to the spanking bench, Grisha's face was in front of her.
"Focus, sweetheart, on me. Breathe with me, and count the strokes." He looked behind her, and Ink's warm hands massaged her butt cheeks.
"She really has a fantastic ass, Grisha. She'll look hot as sin when it's nice and pink from our hands." Ink's voice send tingles of awareness through her, and her panic subsided. His hand dipped lower and spread her pussy lips. He bit her ass, and she squirmed when his fingers sank deep into her already weeping channel. He curled them into a figure of eight, and Estelle panted her excitement as her sensitized tissues responded instantly.
She closed her eyes against the knowing smirk on Grisha's face.
"How is she doing, Ink? Though I bet she's wet for us."
Estelle screwed her eyes shut tighter at Ink's chuckled confirmation.
"Now remember, Estelle, no coming until I give you permission, or you'll be strapped to this thing for a very long time indeed." Ink's voice had lost its amusement, and Estelle breathed her confirmation.
"Good girl, sweetheart, you can do it." Grisha brushed a kiss across her lips. "Now count."
The first slap took her by surprise, and she screeched.
"Count, Estelle." Ink's voice brooked no argument.
"O…one." She bit back tears and barely caught her breath before the next slap came. "Two." Slap. "Three…"
Grisha's hands massaged her shoulders. He murmured Russian words she didn't understand, the warmth of his hands chasing away the goose bumps spreading over her body. Her butt on fire, the strange floating sensations returned. Her pussy clenched with each slap of Ink's hand across her ass until all of her senses heightened. Every trickle of her arousal down her legs left a wave of fire in its wake, sensations too intense to name consuming her. Her body climbed, tensing, clenching, clamoring for the tension within to burst to freedom.
With one last slap hard enough to send her body forward along the bench as far as the restraints would allow, Estelle breathed, "Fifteen."
"Good girl, you did so well." She hardly heard Grisha over the rushing in her ears, her heart beating so loudly, she felt sick. She winced at the coolness placed over her burning ass, and when her restraints were removed she collapsed into Ink's arms.
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Now on to Too Cold to Love...


Marco Giovanni has shut off his emotions, following a messy divorce. His small daughter and his chain of bakeries are all he needs in his life. The string of nannies are an unfortunate necessity he could well do without. So why does his body have to remember its needs now with the latest and most unsuitable nanny ever?

Elise has always been the responsible one, so when she receives yet another SOS phone call from her wayward twin, she does the only thing she can do, she steps into her shoes. Having to go back to nannying is hard enough, the unexpected attraction to her arrogant employer impossible to deal with. Especially when she is forced to agree to a marriage of his convenience to pay off the debt her twin accrued.

In a marriage based on blackmail can passion turn into love, or will secrets and lies destroy all?



Excerpt


Marco's knowing gaze met hers in the bathroom mirror, and the heat she saw in his eyes started a slow answering fire deep within her. Awareness sparked between them.
The towel slowly slipped from her fingers. The ice hit the tiled floor with a thud and broke the spell. She almost ran into the other room and frantically tried the other door.
"I have it on good authority that they are fire doors, my lovely, so I'd give up now. I like your shoulders just the way they are, cara mia."
Marco leant against the door frame propped up by his good shoulder, his arms crossed over his chest, a slow smile on his lips. He checked the lock on the bathroom door.
"And I'm pleased to note there isn't a lock on here, lest you decide to go hiding in another bathroom. I seem to recall you were rather fond of that on our honeymoon."
Elise winced, followed by a vivid blush as she remembered their wedding night.
Marco simply smiled. He slowly advanced towards her, and Elise backed away until she bumped into the wall. He reminded her of a predator stalking his prey.
"Marco, we need to talk."
One last long stride brought him so close his thighs touched hers, and he put one hand either side of her head.  His big body crowded her against the wall, and his sinful mouth hovered over hers.
"So talk, cara mia. I'm all yours."
His hot breath fanned across her face, and Elise closed her eyes. She bit back a moan when he kissed her nose and rained butterfly kisses along her jaw line. He suckled gently on just the right spot on her neck to make her knees turn to jelly.
"Marco…please…stop…"
Somehow she found the strength to put her shaking hands on his chest, only to meet hot, hard, male flesh. This time she couldn't stop the very feminine moan escaping. Was that needy sound really her?
Apparently so, judging by Marco's low groan in her ear. He moved his hand to cup her breast, the nipple thrusting shamelessly into his caress.
"You don't sound as though you want me to stop, cara mia. In fact, I would hazard a guess that you're wet enough for me to fuck you right here."
The crude words should have shocked Elise, but instead she whimpered in response to his words. He ground his hips suggestively into hers until the full force of his erection rested against her pussy. Heat flooded between her thighs, and she pulled his head down for kiss.
"You're talking too much, Tarzan."
She caught a quick glimpse of triumph in his glittering eyes before his mouth claimed hers. His tongue tangled with hers, and they both groaned. One of his hands fisted in her hair, and the other lifted her skirt. He cupped her mound and murmured his approval.
"You're so fucking wet for me."
He bunched the sodden material of her underwear in his hand and pulled. The move brought delicious pressure to her clit, and Elise panted in excitement. Cool air hit her slick folds when the material gave way with an audible rip. His large hand replaced the fabric, and her pussy clamped down on the fingers he thrust into her channel. His teeth nipped her neck, nudging her arousal up another notch, and he kicked her feet apart to spread her wider. She clung to his shoulders, rubbing her breasts against his chest, and he swore. He thrust two more fingers into her hungry cunt, and she lifted her leg to give him better access. He withdrew his fingers, and Elise tensed when he inserted one slick digit into her anus.
"Relax, pasticcino."
His eyes sought hers, and he smiled. He kissed her, and Elise relaxed into the strange sensation. When he inserted another finger into her tight hole, she gasped into his mouth. He thrust slowly in and out of her, and Elise pulled him closer to her still, as her hips moved of their own accord. Unused nerve endings sprang to life, and darts of pleasure skittered to her clitoris. Her breath came in short gaps, as her arousal built.
"That's my girl. I knew you'd like this." Marco's strained voice in her ear was the sexiest sound she'd ever heard. She pushed down on his fingers, seeking more, and moaned her disappointment when he withdrew them slowly. He grabbed her buttocks and ground her aching clit into his still covered cock. He thrust into her, and the friction on her throbbing bud proved too much for Elise.
"Please, Marco."
"What, cara mia?"
Marco pulled away, and she groaned.
"What do you want, my wife?"
The heat in his ever darkening gaze stoked her arousal to fever pitch, and she impatiently tugged at his trousers.
"I want you in me, now, Marco."
His eyes darkened further at her whispered plea, and she breathed a sigh of relief when his hands helped her free his cock. It sprung out of its confines up to his taut stomach, and Elise licked her lips in anticipation. She cupped his balls, and it was Marco's turn to groan.
"Jesus, woman, you're killing me."
He pushed her hands away, and Elise arched into his palms, when he pulled down her tank top and exposed her breasts. He kneaded each aching globe, before he pushed them together and laved the nipples in turn. Every suckle sent shards of pure pleasure down towards Elise's clit where delicious anticipation built in waves. She moaned her protest when Marco released the glistening buds and kissed his way back up to her collarbone. She could feel his strained smile before she saw it.
"Wrap your legs around me. I need to get inside you right now."
 
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